Legally Blonde Musical Lyrics

Blood In The Water

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Blood In The Water Lyrics

    CALLAHAN
    Now when you choose a law career
    The moment you embark
    There is that joke you're bound hear
    A lawyer is a shark

    Ignore that, it's simplistic and it's dumb
    Only some of you will turn out sharks, just some
    The rest are chum

    Our topic is blood in the water
    Kids, it's time you faced
    Law school is a waste
    Oh yes, unless you acquire a taste for

    Blood in the water
    Dark and red and raw
    You're nothing until the thrill of the kill
    Becomes your only law

    (spoken) Mr. . . . Shultz , hypothetical question.
    Would you be willing to defend the following banker accused of fraud?

    (sung) A kind old grandma took her savings and she sent it
    Off to your client, all she saved since she was born
    Well he promised to invest it, but he spent it
    On prostitutes and heroine and porn

    STUDENT
    (spoken) No, I would not want to take that case!

    CALLAHAN
    Wrong! This one is a win unless you're lazy
    Grandma's broke; she'll have some hack from legal aid!
    Put her on the stand and call her old and crazy
    Your guy goes free and he can get you high and laid

    Look for the blood in the water
    Read your Thomas Hobbs
    Only spineless snobs
    Will quarrel with the morally dubious jobs

    Yes, blood in the water
    Your scruples are a flaw

    (spoken) Ms. . . . Hupes, hypothetical question.
    Would you be the right lawyer for the following client?

    (sung) Say they offer you a bundle for defending
    A famous hit man for the mafia elite
    Seems he missed his chosen prey
    Killed a nun and drove away
    Running over three cute puppies in the street

    STUDENT
    (spoken) What, you think I wouldn't defend him just because he's a typical man?

    CALLAHAN
    (spoken) Oh, you lesbians think you're so tough

    STUDENT
    (spoken) But--

    CALLAHAN
    Oh dear, I fear my comment has offended
    Hard to argue, though, when you're too mad to speak
    Your employment will be very quickly ended
    When they see how your emotions make you weak

    So what's my point? I run a billion dollar law firm!
    And I hire four new interns every year
    From this class I will select four young sharks whom I respect
    And those four will have a guaranteed career
    Do you follow me?

    So I wanna see . . . What?

    STUDENTS
    Blood in the water

    CALLAHAN
    Exactly, let the games begin

    STUDENTS
    Hm-mm-mm-mm

    CALLAHAN
    Four of you will win

    STUDENTS
    Hm-mm-mm-mm-ooh-ooh-ooh

    CALLAHAN
    But just those four with the dorsal fin
    Yes, blood in the water
    So fight and scratch and claw

    (spoken) Yes, Miss, uh

    ELLE
    (spoken) Woods, Elle Woods

    CALLAHAN
    (spoken) Someone's had their morning coffee.
    Would you summarize the case of State of Indiana v. Hurn in your reading?

    ELLE
    (spoken) Oh, I wanted to answer the puppy question?

    CALLAHAN
    (spoken) But I'm asking you about the assigned reading.

    ELLE
    (spoken) Okay, who assigns reading for the first day of class?

    CALLAHAN
    (spoken) You have guts, Ms. Woods. Ms. . . . Kenzington

    (sung) Let's say you teach a class at Harvard Law School
    A position that you're justly proud about
    But a girl on whom you call hasn't read the case at all
    Should you let it go or--

    VIVIENNE
    (spoken) No! I'd throw her out!

    CALLAHAN
    All right, then.
    You have heard your classmate
    You have just been killed
    She cut your throat, so grab your coat
    Yes, you've got guts but

    ALL
    Now there's spilled your
    Blood in the water

    CALLAHAN
    So would you please withdraw
    And if you return
    Be ready to learn
    Or is it unfair?
    Oh, wait I don't care!
    That's just how I rule
    In life and in school
    With fear and shock and gall

    CALLAHAN
    You're nothing until

    STUDENTS
    Blood in the water

    CALLAHAN
    The thrill of the kill

    STUDENTS
    Blood in the water

    CALLAHAN
    Becomes your only law

    STUDENTS
    Blood in the water

    CALLAHAN
    Your only law

    STUDENTS
    Blood in the water

    CALLAHAN
    Your only law

    STUDENTS
    Blood in the water
    BLOOD IN THE WATER!